Thomas: Hola! Un vino blanco y un majestic, por favor!

El Camarero: Si! <Machinegun spanish>

Thomas: …Fuck it. A white wine and an orange fruity thing, please.

El Camarero: …Yes sir.

El Talachero: Hola! Habla espanol?

Thomas: Solomente un muy pequito.

El Talachero: Si, si. <Machinegun spanish>

Thomas: …

El Talachero: …points to air conditioner. Thump thump thump thump thump! No more!

Thomas: Ah! Si! Gracias!

Thomas: Hola! Quiermos internet en la habitacion vente dos cincuentra tres, por vavor!

El Conserje: Si! <Machinegun spanish>

Thomas: …

El Conserje: You don’t really speak Spanish, do you sir?

Thomas: …No.

A Mobius Strip is a neat mathematical concept of a solid object that only has one surface; you can make one by giving a piece of paper a half-twist and then tapping the ends together.

Or, if you’re like this crafty individual, you can make one with a 3D printer:

There are more pictures here.

This is really cool, and I’m temped to buy one. The only problem is you have to figure out a way to add the ball bearings yourself.

(via BoingBoing)

Winner of a much-deserved Red Dot Design Award, the Paper Dish replaces the greaseproof sheet found between a pizza and a cardboard box with an improved design that easily tears apart creating a miniature paper plate for each slice.

(via Gizmodo)

It’s basically an Ewok village carved out of a bonsai tree, and I do want it so.

Update: io9 has a lot info.

The answer is OMG ADORABLE:

(via Boing Boing)

Every once in a while, I get to say something that’s just kind of cool. I had one of those happy moments tonight. To wit:

I’m the scariest guy you know. The fact that he concerns me should tell you something.

I’ll leave the context of that little nugget to your imagination.

I dropped by Wal Mart on the way home tonight. The cashier asked the woman ahead of me if she wanted to spend a dollar on one of those hearts/shamrocks/whatevers that go to feed starving soldiers without puppies or whatever. The woman stopped, considered, and then asked:

“Is it tax deductible?”

I just kind of stared at her. No, this one dollar donation is, sadly, not tax deductible. No, the woman working the overnight at Wal Mart will not be writing you a receipt to document, for the benefit of the IRS, your lavish generosity. This dollar, this single, lonely dollar, will be forever lost to you, earning you no reward and no recognition, save maybe the warm feeling in your heart.

The woman said “no thanks.”

I was asked this afternoon if it would be possible to develop a new user interface over the weekend. I hate questions like this, because the answer is usually “yes,” but a “yes” qualified with “if I work seventeen hours a day, every day between now and Monday, stopping only long enough to get more potato chips and soda out of the vending machine, and occasionally using the loo.” I relayed this fact, and the guy doing the asking got a thoughtful look on his face, then said “I’ll ask management,” and wandered away.

I enjoy the Celtic motif – as you could probably tell by the look of my site – and because of that, I have a lot of Celtic “stuff” laying around; a Lion Rampant on a t-shirt, a few Celtic crosses, a number Claddagh rings (I keep damaging them), and an Irish war sword, because that’s how I roll.

Anyway, one of those crosses, a gift from my father, is inscribed with a traditional Irish blessing:

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.

I looked at it as I walked in the door today, and I realized something. “May the road rise to meet you” kind of implies that you’re walking uphill. And that’s considerably harder than walking on level terrain. For hundreds, maybe thousands of years, my people have been cursing each other, and calling it a blessing.

Also, it’s pronounced “keltic.” Thank you.

I bring a book with me when I go to the dentist. I think that whole “sit here with your back to the door while the doctor decides if its worth his time to come and visit you” thing is a power play, like they want to let you know who’s boss. Bringing a book turns that on its head. One: I will not just sit here and stare at the wall; I will accomplish something while I’m here, thankyouverymuch. Two: oh, you’re ready to play dentist now, are you. Well you can just wait until I’m done with this paragraph, buster.

I’ve finally had hair long enough where it’s time to get it cut. So, two things. One: anyone know a good hair stylist? Two: any recommendations as to what I should do with it? “Shaving it all off” isn’t an option, for now.

Speaking of, a whole lot of people apparently thought that I was actually bald, and not just shaving it off. In the last week, I’ve had at least five people come up to me, run their fingers through my hair, and say something like “wow, I thought you were just trying to hide a bald spot.” That wouldn’t be nearly so creepy if most of the people doing the finger-running weren’t men.

Also speaking of, no, my hair is not really this shade of red. It’s actually brown, and goes blond if I’m out in the sun too much. My eyebrows were nearly white, they got so bleached out over the summer. Anyway, the highlights are just for kicks, and available at Wal Mart for about six bucks. Nice & Easy #114: Dark Auburn. Tell them Thomas sent you.

SPOLIERS for Marley and Me. If you advertise your movie as a feel-good comedy, it isn’t fair to kill the dog at the end. If I wanted my tears jerked, I’d cut up an onion. Which doesn’t bother me, actually. END SPOILERS.

A few days ago, a friend told me that I have “excellent grammar,” and that “that’s very enjoyable.” On the list of compliments that have been paid me, that is… certainly one of them. I mean, she could have said “dashing” or “witty” or “insightful,” but “you know where the apostrophe goes” is good, too.

I’ve started incorporating a lot of Olympic lifts into my routine again. I tell you, the US Team should send out a camera crew and video my workouts, then show them to their lifters. The series could be called “This Is Exactly What Not To Do.” Seriously, I’m pretty sure I screw up every cue that you can and still wind up with a bar somewhere over your head.

If you’re being given a psychological evaluation, and you know you’re being given a psychological evaluation, you can have a whole lot of fun. This may not be particularly beneficial to your career, however.