Thomas Galvin
Purveyor of Fine Pulp Fiction

Triquetra
The best way to predict the future is to create it. -Peter Drucker

Previously, on Sire Book Club

Spoiler warning: these posts are (obviously) going to be spoiler heavy, so if you haven’t read the book yet, but plan to, be careful.

Also, I don’t want to spoil things from people who are reading along with us, so please don’t talk about things that happen in latter chapters. Once these chapter-by-chapter posts are done, I’ll do one last, whole-book post where we can talk about anything that didn’t fit into a particular chapter.

If you don’t have the book, you can get it right now in digital format. And if you order the paperback, you can get a free digital copy. (Also: let me know if you have a problem getting that digital copy. It’s worked for everyone that’s tried so far, but I still don’t entirely trust it.)

- Angelica’s Palace of Pain – Court of Confinement -

Angelica: So Caitlin, would you like to become a semi-permanent guest, until I inevitably kill you in a jealous rage?

Caitlin Manning: No?

Angelica: Evan?

Evan: Durr let me show you to your room! Or Else! Durr.

- Angelica’s Palace of Pain – Bedroom of Bad Guy Exposition -

Angelica: So, would you like a “bad guy explains the plot” speech?

Caitlin Manning: Boy would I!

Angelica: Excellent! So, as you know I am very fond of Michael(‘s penis), and I’m afraid that you’re getting in the way (of my vajayjay and his penis). Also, this whole “emo emo emo, I’m a monster and no one will ever love me emo” thing he’s got going on? Not exactly a turn on. But! I have a plan. And that plan is to starve him and torture him until he’s a wild animal, and then turn him lose on you. And once he realizes how tasty humans are, and how much fun it is to rip even the cutes ones to tender little shreds, I’m certain that he’ll fall back in love with me!

Caitlin Manning: I kind of hate this plan!

Angelica: You’re supposed to!

On to the next chapter!

0 Responses to “Sire Book Club – Chapter Twenty-One”

  1. Thomas says:

    So, this chapter originally included something you might find interesting: Angelica’s daughter.

    Not her literal daughter, but a little demon baby she’s picked up along the way. The daughter survived all the way until the last draft, when I decided that carting around a child, no matter how old she really was, just didn’t mesh with Angelica’s personality.

    But for my friends here on the blog, here’s the section that I excised, where we meet a little girl filled with mirth and fangs:


    Caitlin was walking over to the bookshelf when she caught a flash of movement out of the corner of her eye. She jumped and pushed herself against the wall, like that would offer any protection. Then she saw a glimpse of a tiny little head, covered in thick blond curls, peeking out from behind the wardrobe.

    “Hello?” Caitlin said, cautiously. At the sound of her voice, a little girl stepped into view. She was six or seven years old, and dressed up in what looked like a period costume, a blue dress with a white sash, almost like Alice in Wonderland. She looked down at the ground, and turned one toe against the floor.

    Caitlin’s heart broke to see her. “Little girl,” she said, and took a step toward her, but she scurried away from me. Caitlin stopped where she was, and knelt down on the floor. “It’s okay, little girl, I won’t hurt you. How did you get in here?”

    The little girl looked up at her. She had wide blue eyes, and ruby lips. A smile lit up her face as she spoke. “I’m very clever, and very quiet.” Her voice was like music. “I can go wherever I want,” she announced proudly.

    “Are you here all alone?” Caitlin asked.

    “No, silly,” she answered. “I’m here with my mommy.”

    “Your mommy is here? Is she all right? Do you know where she is?”

    “Mommy is doing quite well,” the little girl answered, looking down at the floor again. “She’s been very sad, but she seems more cheerful now.”

    “Maybe your mommy would be happier if she could get out of this house for a little while?” The girl looked up at Caitlin, unconvinced. “If you can show me how you got in here, we can go find your mommy, and then we can all leave together. Does that sound like a good idea?”

    “Oh, yes!” The little girl ran toward her, and Caitlin reached out her arms to hold her. She stopped when I heard a key rattling in the door.

    “Okay, you’re going to have to be very quiet …” Caitlin turned back to the little girl, and screamed. Her blue eyes had gone blood red, and her tiny little teeth had lengthened into tiny little fangs. She was about the throw herself at Caitlin’s throat.

    “Elizabeth!” Angelica’s voice rang through the room. “What did I tell you?”

    The little girl’s visage shifted back into her human form. “Caitlin is our guest,” she said, looking at the floor.

    “And?”

    “And we don’t eat our guests,” the girl said. “I’m sorry, mommy, but she looks so delicious.”

    Angelic smiled, and knelt down. Elizabeth ran over to her, and Angelica swept her up into her arms. “I know, darling, I know. It’s all right, I forgive you.” Angelica looked up at Caitlin. “Sorry, but you know how children can be. You have to watch them every second.” She tapped Elizabeth on the end of her nose. The little girl squealed in delight. “Run and play, Elizabeth. Caitlin and I have much to discuss.”

    “Yes, mommy,” the little girl said, scampered out the door.

    Caitlin looked on, horrified. “Mommy?” I asked.

    Angelica stood to her feet. “Adoptive. I killed her real mother … oh, it must have been twenty years ago now. She begged me to spare Elizabeth, and I’m kind of ashamed to admit it, but something about her begging got to me.”

    “But, you killed her,” Caitlin said, dumbfounded. “You killed a little girl.”

    Angelica looked puzzled. “Well, yes, but she got better.”

    “You turned her into a monster.”

    Angelica looked at her, truly shocked at her words. “I set her free,” she said in a completely reasonable voice. “She was weak and fragile, like all of you are weak and fragile. And I gave her strength, and power, and a life that will never, ever end.” She looked at the door through which her daughter had run. “I saved her,” she said.

    “But that’s all beside the point. I wanted to make sure that you were comfortable here, and keeping your strength up…”

  2. Brian in Shortsville says:

    LOL. Your recap script pretty much covers this Chapter.

    It’s Angelica telling Caitlin exactly how deep the shit’s gonna get.

    What I needed; and I don’t know if it should have gone here or been better somewhere else; what the “what makes Michael so special” Bad Guy explains the plot speech.

    Maybe she could have given it to Liam or something before the STUbies ended him. He seems like the kinda guy who’d ask why she’s giving HIM shit, and wasting her time on the vegan baby vamp. Waaaah, why does HE get preferential treatment?

    Here she just says she wants Michael to be her equal, has the potential to be her equal, he’s special, he’s fierce.

    We never find out what it is about Michael that MAKES him unique among “pretty people who can make pretty things” for Angelica’s Vampire Barbie Dream House. We never find out what that certain ‘X’ factor is about Michael. We know he’s Angelica’s favorite, but that’s a matter of taste.

    What makes him fierce, and, potentially Angelica’s equal, and MAYBE, once he’s all grown up, possibly a threat to her?

    And I could’ve bought Angelica playing House or playing Mommy. I don’t think it would have changed how I saw her, or moved any plot for you, but I wouldn’t have called Ass Pull if you’d gone there.

    Would’ve been interesting seeing a 19 year-old STUbuie underestimating a six or seven year old that’s actually older and possibly more educated and plain smarter (especially in the ways of the supernatural) than them.

    Ultimately though, I see why you cut it. It would have been a bit of an indulgence. May have been a fun diversion, but it would have only been a diversion, not moving the story of Michael and Caitlin anywhere, but maybe down a dead-end side-street.

  3. Eliane says:

    Hi Thomas :-)

    Interesting to read what else could have been in this chapter. It’s impressive to see how much of the author’s work, how many good ideas and parts of the plot don’t end up in the final draft of a book.
    But I’m glad you didn’t include Angelica’s daughter in Sire. For me, it would have felt strange to suddenly meet such a special sort of vampire in the middle of this action and drama packed story. I think Elizabeth would have seemed quite disconnected from the rest of the story. And she definitely reminded me too much of Claudia in Anne Rices’ ‘Interview with the Vampire’.

    I really like the chapter the way it is now. Angelica’s speech was important to have as an explanation and was overdue ;)
    The only thing that surprised me a bit was the fact that you made Caitlin fall asleep so fast after her renewed kidnapping. I completely understand that she is numb and doesn’t have the energy left to fight or feel panicked, but still… would have expected her to lie down and stay awake for hours, not being able to shut down enough to fall sleep. But well… I haven’t experienced what Caitlin has – so, who knows? ;)

  4. Thomas says:

    Hi Brian,

    In my head, what Angelica sees in Michael is pretty much what we’ve seen on the page … he’s a badass meat grinder that will cut down pretty anything you set in front of him, and he’ll draw you a pretty picture when he’s done.

    And he’s the shiny new thing. A distraction, just like Liam was back when he was turned. Angelica is the type to get fixated on someone… it’s just that she’s always going to live long enough for that infatuation to fade.

    Baby Vamp was an idea that I just didn’t have the time or energy to flush out, so I’m glad I cut it.

  5. Thomas says:

    Hi Eliane,

    Baby Vamp did kind of come out of nowhere, but that’s a facet of how this story was originally written. In the first draft, Angelica came out of nowhere … she was a looming presence throughout the whole story, but we never met her until the last five chapters. Baby Vamp was actually meant to flush out Angelica’s character some. It’s just that in this draft, what it would have revealed just didn’t apply any more.

    And I can see a lof of comparisons to Claudia … though I didn’t have any intentions of going down the “adult driven crazy by being trapped in a child’s body” road.

    And at this point, Caitlin was just done. TOo many kidnappings, too many threats, too many deaths. Most people would be catatonic by this point, I think.