Vampire Diaries – S04E18 – American Gothic

previously, on The Vampire Diaries…

Rebekah: Elena Consuela Gilbert, you get your pert little butt back in this car right this instant!

Elena Gilbert: Chill out, Rebekah! I have to pee!

Rebekah: Okay, two things. One, we stopped at a gas station just ten minutes ago, and you could have peed there. Two, you’re a vampire, and you don’t even pee.

Elena Gilbert: Okay, so be “pee” I meant “tear out an innocent bystander’s throat in the middle of the sidewalk in broad daylight in front of dozens of witnesses, thereby demonstrating exactly how many shits I do not give.”

Rebekah: And I suppose you’ve forgotten all about our plan to track down Katherine, steal the cure, preserve your immortality and get me pregnant?

Elena Gilbert: Hey, maybe we’ll find a clue to Katherine’s whereabouts here in town!

Rebekah: Oh come on, the odds of running into someone who even knows who Katherine is in this random podunk town are about a million to–

Lanie: Hi Katherine! Good to see you again! Would you care for a quick sip from my cephalic vein? Have you picked up any other supernatural trinkets you’d like me to hide in my sock drawer? Any dastardly plans I can assist you with and then immediately forget?

Rebekah: …Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.